Your Negativity Could Be Costing You Clients

In this blog post, I will share how you can take control of your life through choices you make.

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Have you ever come across the phrase ‘cause and effect’ when it comes to being in control of your life? It’s an NLP language pattern and could be something that’s costing you lots of time, energy and maybe even dreamie clients.

What’s it all about?

If you’re at ‘EFFECT’ someone/something else is in control of your life

  • One thing causes another (the effect)
  • You blame others for not succeeding
  • You come from a disempowered place because you believe you are reliant on situations / circumstances / people to effect change

If you’re at ‘CAUSE’ you’re in control of your life

  • You create your life
  • You take responsibility for your life and what happens in it
  • You come from a powerful place because you believe you can effect change

I know which place I’d rather be in. The one where I get to create my world, where I’m in control and taking responsibility for my life and what happens in it. It isn’t wishful thinking, it doesn’t mean things won’t go wrong, they probably will, that’s life, but it’s your reaction to them that counts.

Let’s use Facebook for visibility as an example. We all know the algorithms have changed and it’s been more challenging to reach our audiences. (Personally I’m super grateful to Facebook, it’s helped me connect with some amazing business owners, dreamie clients, and more importantly incredible friends).

So, if you’re at effect, you might say, “The algorithms are ruining my business, I might as well give up and get a job”.  However, if you’re at cause, you might say, “So the algorithms have changed, what can I do differently to boost my engagement?”

It’s easier to blame others though, isn’t it? We can pass on all responsibility to someone else, it’s easier.

It’s alright for ‘so and so’, they’ve got money to throw around to build their business, they get all the lucky breaks, there are just too many people out there doing what you do, it’s no wonder your business isn’t working, right?

WRONG.

If that’s your thinking then it’s time to turn it around.

Nobody is to blame if your business isn’t working, and that includes you! Blame doesn’t serve anybody, it will help you wallow, not take action. You can take responsibility for being where you are right now, for the decisions that you’ve made bringing you to this place in your business journey. Nobody is at fault. Don’t give your power away. Take ownership of your business and life.

If you want to be successful you want to be at cause – in control. You’re an owner of your business, now you get to be the owner of your life too! How cool is that?!

When you’re at cause you aren’t a victim, you’re a powerful business owner, who can choose what action to take to build your business.

Just think for a moment, how making the decision to live at cause will impact your business.

So you didn’t sign up that new client. You can decide that it doesn’t matter if there’s lots of business owners out there doing what you do. You could spend time figuring out what makes you different, whether your services were the right fit for that client and how you can make the next call go better.

Your launch didn’t go so well. You can choose to focus on what did go well. Maybe following everyone else’s blueprint doesn’t work for you. Maybe it’s time to pull together a different way of launching, one that feels easy and flows.

You didn’t hit the numbers you wanted to hit in your business this month. You get to decide how you can do things differently next month. You don’t need to stay in victim mode, feeling like the world is against you, you can feel instantly empowered, ready to take action and with a fire in your belly for your business, all by making the decision that you get to choose how you run your business (and life!)

You didn’t get all of the work done that you set out to do. That’s okay too. You can sit down and work out what really needed to be done, and choose to figure out a smarter way of working going forward, one where you set clearer goals and measurable targets.

If you want your business to be successful, DECIDE today for it to be so and then go out there and make it happen! You’ve got what it takes, now go show us what you’ve got!

Call To Action: Figure out if you’re at cause or effect. Let me know what decision you make from listening to/reading this post and what action you’ll take as a result.

Remember to check out my Visibility Quiz to find out whether you’re a Visibility Lady, Countess, Princess or Queen. If you’re a guy then please change the names to Lord, Count, Prince and King) Once you’ve got your score I’d love for you to come on over to my pinned post on my business page and tell me what score you got. There’s a chance to win a little prize each month.

Also, I would love to interview Ladies, Countesses, Princesses & Queens on my podcast show, Rock Your Fabulous Biz. I’ll be asking you all about what you do on visibility right now, what’s working for you, what’s not and where you’d like to be. If you’re interested then apply for your spot here – http://bit.ly/PodVisQuiz. In order for your application to be considered, you’ll need to have completed the quiz though as I’ll need to know what you’ve scored etc.

Are You Trying To Be Mary Poppins In Your Biz?

In this blog post, I will share why you don’t need to be a perfect business owner to be successful.

Join my free FB community to connect with me and other fabulous solopreneurs to help you Rock Your Fabulous Biz.

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You don’t need to be Mary Poppins, or practically perfect, and you probably don’t even have the time! You need to go with 80% perfect and that needs to be good enough, or you’ll never make any money in your business!

In what way are you a perfectionist? Perfectionism is all about having super high standards, the dictionary definition when I Googled it says this – “Refusal to accept any standard short of perfection.” Wow, so much pressure! If this is you, then it’s time to change. Life gets SO much more fun when you just loosen up a bit (I know!)

What’s going on?

Fear of judgement – Ironic really when the biggest person that’s judging you is you!

Fear of failure – you WILL make mistakes, fact! Make them, learn from them. It’s feedback, not failure.

Fear of ‘it’ not being good enough – Check the impact, ‘How much will this really matter in three months, six months, one year’s time?’

Imposter Syndrome – Where you think you’re going to be found out. You are – you’re going to be found out to be the fabulous person that you are.

I bet if you think about your family and best friends, you could share one thing that’s not perfect about them. If you can’t, then they’re probably perfectionists and hiding their weaknesses really well! We all have them.

A story about perfectionism

What expectations are you putting on yourself?

Let me share one of my personal experiences, which may help you realise that if you do have perfectionist traits you’re not on your own!

I went for my IIC & M (International Institute of Coaching & Mentoring) Accredited Senior Coach assessment. I was really nervous about it and procrastinated over it for about a year and a half. I finally did the assessment and I was stressed out all day waiting for the call to just be over and done with.

The main reason for my fear was that I’m not what you call a ‘purist’ coach, I don’t just coach, I bring in mentoring too, and for this assessment I had to stick to pure coaching.  I knew I’d passed as I was told on the call, and I got some great feedback.

I then just had to wait for the certificate and the actual grade to come through. When it did, I was really disappointed. The pass mark was 75%, I got 86%. I didn’t think I’d done that well. I completely discounted that I’d passed and was now an Accredited Senior Coach, all because of a silly number. My brain still says I should have got a higher grade but I have to remind my mindset monkey that it’s okay not to be perfect!

Are you perfect? No?? Why not??!!

I wrote about perfectionism in the chapters of a book I co-authored. Here’s an extract…

“Now you might not want to hear this. Perfectionism is also hiding a lack of confidence and the need to be liked.

Think about it for a moment…

  •      You don’t want to send out that letter with a typo on. Why? You don’t want people to think you’re unprofessional.
  •      You don’t want to put a post on social media that’s less than perfect. Why? Because you’re worried about what people think.
  •      You don’t start a new action/activity. Why? Because you think someone will do it better than you can.

We want people to like us, there is a need for approval and we think if we show any flaws then people won’t like us. Well, you know what you are NEVER going to get everyone to like you. NEVER. Some people will totally love and get you. Others might think you’re crazy or you might drive them crazy.

The tip to working through your perfectionism is you need to learn to let go.

For those of you that are perfectionists, I know, how on earth do you do that, it’s impossible, right?! Well, it can be done but it’s uncomfortable for a while.

Why is it so hard to do a less than perfect job, but so comfortable to attempt a better job?

Perfectionism doesn’t just affect your life, it may be really stifling your business/work too. I like things to be perfect, but I’m slowly learning that 80% can be good enough. My online coaching programmes might never have launched if I hadn’t chosen just to release them into the world and tweak as I go. People are taking steps in their businesses because I put myself out there; fear and faults, or not.

So what’s wrong with wanting to do a really good job or creating something perfect? Nothing. It’s when the judgement, analysis and criticism kick in that it becomes a problem. It’s when it stops us in our tracks, preventing us from moving forward that we need to recognise it’s holding us back.

Don’t let perfectionism ruin your life and/or work. Take some steps to deal with it.”

Become a work in progress like me!

Perfectionism is self-sabotaging behaviour and doesn’t serve you. It stops you from sharing your amazing gifts with the world. It’s time to let it go and be imperfectly perfect.

Call To Action: This week I want you to take some imperfect action

Let’s say;

  •      You have drafted some wording for a post, then use it – post it
  •      You might have a blog post sitting on your desktop, finish and publish it
  •      You might be waiting to get the right video equipment or the perfect background for your Facebook Live – just do it already. It doesn’t need to be perfect. Check out mine, I umm, ahhh, waffle and forget what I want to say. It’s all okay, don’t let perfectionism hold you back
  •      You might not be talking to people about what you do because your elevator pitch isn’t perfect – just share your message
  •      You might not be doing business because you don’t have a website. It’s all nonsense! One of my past mentors has been in business for 20 years and still doesn’t have a website. She gets clients. Do NOT let this kind of thing hold you back

You KNOW what it is you’re putting off. Just do it.

No more excuses. THIS WEEK!

Remember to check out my Visibility Quiz to find out whether you’re a Visibility Lady, Countess, Princess or Queen. If you’re a guy then please change the names to Lord, Count, Prince and King) Once you’ve got your score I’d love for you to come on over to my pinned post on my business page and tell me what score you got. There’s a chance to win a little prize each month.

Also, I would love to interview Ladies, Countesses, Princesses & Queens on my podcast show, Rock Your Fabulous Biz. I’ll be asking you all about what you do on visibility right now, what’s working for you, what’s not and where you’d like to be. If you’re interested then apply for your spot here – http://bit.ly/PodVisQuiz. In order for your application to be considered, you’ll need to have completed the quiz though as I’ll need to know what you’ve scored etc.

Are You Distorting The Truth?

In this blog post, I will share some ways your mind might be tricking you when it comes to being visible in your business and what you can do about it

Join my free FB community to connect with me and other fabulous solopreneurs to help you Rock Your Fabulous Biz.

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In NLP we talk about cognitive distortions, and even if you’ve done all of the self-development work in the world and your bookshelves are bursting at the seams with personal development books (Oh, is that just my bookshelves then?!) it’s likely that you’ll still end up distorting reality in some way.

When I talk about reality I often wonder whether there is even such a thing. We all have our own interpretations of what’s happened/happening. Okay, okay, I’m going too deep here, let me stay focused, haha!

So what are cognitive distortions?

They are essentially thinking that is distorted, not true. You may notice yourself in some of these distortions. I’ve shared 5 examples of how it might play out with your visibility and how you can work through them.

  1. MIND READING

This is all about making negative assumptions, we are reading the mind of the other person, making up a story of what it could mean.

What You Might Say
“I posted X so they’ll think …. “ (X could be a social media post, blog post etc.)

Challenge It
How do you know? We assume people think certain things about us, and often that assumption is that it’s bad. Ask yourself, “What if they love what I’ve written?”, “What if they really needed to hear that particular message today?”

  1. ALL OR NOTHING THINKING

Black and white thinking – there’s no flexibility

What You Might Say
“I didn’t complete my blog post so it was a complete waste of time”
“They didn’t sign up so I’m rubbish at sales”

Challenge It
This is all about what you are making it mean. Harsh but true! So, you didn’t complete my blog post. So what! Will the world end because your blog post didn’t go out? Unlikely! Ask yourself, “What got in the way?”, “Were there other pressing priorities?”. Tell yourself that you’ve made some progress, so it’s not a complete waste of time, and then challenge yourself to complete the rest of the post by a certain deadline.

For the sales one, ask yourself what other reasons there could be for people not signing up, i.e.

  • Was my message strong enough?
  • Did I have the right offering?
  • What about timings? Did I do sufficient things leading up to the offer of buying something? etc.

There will be many areas that you can test and tweak around your sales. By using the non-sales as an invitation to explore you can open up loads of opportunities to improve. Like anything in business, things need tweaking and adapting over time.

  1. OVER GENERALISATION

This is where you tell yourself, you ‘always’ do something, or you ‘never’ do something

What You Might Say
“I’m always scared to do anything on visibility”
“I always have a lack of confidence when it comes to… “
“I never get likes on any posts that I write”

Challenge It

Ask yourself, “What am I scared of specifically?” It might be that Facebook Lives are a particular area of visibility that you find uncomfortable.

  • Drill down into the specifics of the fear.  
    What specific element about Facebook Lives are you scared of?
  • What specifically makes you feel uncomfortable?
  • Is it not knowing how to do the technical side, what to say, what to wear, how to label the video, how to come across in the right way?

As you unpack this you’ll find you have more to work with, and can create a little plan to improve your skills

  1. DWELLING

This is where you spend time ruminating on things that went wrong instead of what’s gone right.

What You Might Say
“That launch was awful, I never get clients coming in when I do launches”
“I did that video and it was awful, I messed up my wording, kept ‘umm’ing all the time. I hated it”

The launch one is actually one of my personal go-to’s. I’ve had great experiences with launches and not so great experiences, yet this one likes to trip me up on a regular basis!

Challenge It
Ask yourself, “Was the launch completely awful?”, “What lessons could I take away from it that would help me do a better launch next time?”, “What other ways could I bring people onto my programme, without doing the heavy launch business model?” (I’ll be writing a post on that one at some point!)

The video – Ask yourself, “What happened that made me mess up my wording?”, “What can I learn from this that will help me do a better video next time?” Often when we mess up on video, we’ve had distractions, someone has come online live that’s completely thrown us, and/or we might not have prepared as well as we could, or maybe even it just wasn’t the day to go live – maybe that day was the day you were tired or not at your best energy wise. There will always be a lesson you can learn from it to help to improve going forwards.

  1. FORTUNE TELLING

Have you got your crystal ball out and you’re trying to foretell what’s going to happen in the future in your biz? Well stop it already! You’re making negative predictions without evidence/facts (Oh and don’t tell me that you have past evidence – that is just what it is – in the past – so that isn’t a measure of how things can go instead!)

What You Might Say
“My webinar is going to go badly.”
“Nobody will sign up for my challenge”

Challenge It
Simply ask yourself, “How do I know?” Seriously, how can you possibly know how it will go? It could be rocking for all you know. Keep challenging yourself and remember past is not always an indicator of the future.

So there you have it – 5 simple ways to work out where you might be creating distortions in your biz.

Share below which one you think you might do, and what you’re going to do instead.

Remember to check out my Visibility Quiz to find out whether you’re a Visibility Lady, Countess, Princess or Queen. If you’re a guy then please change the names to Lord, Count, Prince and King) Once you’ve got your score I’d love for you to come on over to my pinned post on my business page (http://bit.ly/FBbizPinnedPost) and tell me what score you got. There’s a chance to win a little prize each month.

Also, I would love to interview Ladies, Countesses, Princesses & Queens on my podcast show, Rock Your Fabulous Biz. I’ll be asking you all about what you do on visibility right now, what’s working for you, what’s not and where you’d like to be. If you’re interested then apply for your spot here. In order for your application to be considered, you’ll need to have completed the quiz though as I’ll need to know what you’ve scored etc.

Part 6 Rock Your Procrastination & Overwhelm

In today’s blog post, I will be sharing part six of a seven-part mini-training series to help you rock your visibility. Check out the other training in the series here if you missed them.

Part 1 of 7 Rock Your Mindset
Part 2 Rock Your Connection
Part 3 Rock Your Story

Part 4 Rock Your Relationship Building
Part 5 Rock Your Planning

In this episode you’ll learn:

  • How to be visible when you’re making every excuse under the sun not to be!
  • How knowing your personal signs of overwhelm can really help you
  • One word to kick overwhelm into touch forever
  • A super quick strategy for overcoming overwhelm when you’re in it
  • Dealing with the procrastination monster
  • A 3-step strategy for tackling procrastination
  • A fabulous procrastination busting tool

Here’s a link to my Fabulous Resource Centre: http://bit.ly/FabResCtr
You’ll also get access to lots of other biz resources too!

Join my free Facebook Group, Rock Your Fabulous Biz, to get free visibility hints, tips and trainings – Rock Your Fabulous Biz.

Part 5 Rock Your Planning

In this blog post, I will share part five of a seven part mini-training series to help you rock your visibility. Check out the other trainings in the series here if you missed them. 
Part 1 of 7 Rock Your Mindset
Part 2 Rock Your Connection
Part 3 Rock Your Story

Part 4 Rock Your Relationship Building

In this episode you’ll learn:

  • The number one boring thing you need to do to be visible in your biz (It REALLY works!)
  • 6 steps to creating an exciting and sparkly visibility plan (a plan you can use on repeat)
  • Book mentioned:
    • Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod
  • Programme mentioned:

Here’s a link to my Fabulous Resource Centre: http://bit.ly/FabResCtr
You’ll also get access to lots of other biz resources too!

Join my free Facebook Group, Rock Your Fabulous Biz, to get free visibility hints, tips and trainings – Rock Your Fabulous Biz.

 

Part 3 Rock Your Story

In this blog post, I will be sharing part three of a seven part mini-training series to help you rock your visibility. Check out parts one and two, Rock Your Mindset and Rock Your Connection, if you missed them.

In this episode you’ll learn:

  • How to be visible when you don’t know what to share
  • A super simple strategy to help you come up with a year’s worth of content
  • Lots of different things that you can share to improve your visibility

Here’s a link to my Fabulous Resource Centre: http://bit.ly/FabResCtr
You’ll also get access to lots of other biz resources too!

Join my free FB community to connect with me and other fabulous solopreneurs to help you Rock Your Fabulous Biz.

Part 2 Rock Your Connection

In this blog post, I will be sharing part two of a seven part mini-training series to help you rock your visibility. Part one is all about rocking your mindset. Check out part one, Rock Your Mindset, if you missed it.

In this episode you’ll learn:

  • Why you need to be passionate about your business, and how it’s not unspiritual to be paid for your services
  • What you need to get really clear on
  • A simple bust fearing strategy
  • Why you shouldn’t charge what you’re worth
  • How to stand out from the crowd
  • THE most important ‘tool’ in your business

Here’s a link to my Fabulous Resource Centre: http://bit.ly/FabResCtr

You’ll also get access to lots of other biz resources too!

Join my free FB community to connect with me and other fabulous solopreneurs to help you Rock Your Fabulous Biz.

Part 1 of 7 Rock Your Mindset

In this blog post, I will be sharing part one of a seven-part mini-training series to help you rock your visibility. Part one is all about rocking your mindset.

In this episode you’ll learn:

  • How working on your mindset is the number one thing you need to be working on to be visible in your business
  • How to create a powerful story to support your business success
  • A simple mindset hack for challenging your limiting beliefs
  • 7 tips to overcome self-doubt

Here’s a link to my Fabulous Resource Centre: http://bit.ly/FabResCtr

You’ll also get access to lots of other biz resources too!

Join my free FB community to connect with me and other fabulous solopreneurs to help you Rock Your Fabulous Biz.

Why You Need To Have A Can-Do Attitude In Your Business, With Gail Gibson

In today’s episode, I will be talking to Gail Gibson about having a can-do attitude and growth mindset. Gail is an award-winning business performance coach who enables small businesses, through the teaching of effective tools, techniques and strategies, to discover ways to perform at their personal best, to make their dreams happen in life and business.

Development of a Can Do or growth mindset is key to Gail’s coaching success. Through her coaching programmes Gail’s aim is to encourage a shift in thinking, with a key focus on accountability for sustained growth, which empowers small businesses to be brave, be bold, be remarkable and believe in themselves. 

In this episode, you’ll learn

Key points

  • Why you need to believe in yourself in business
  • The importance of a growth mindset and can-do attitude
  • 3 tips that will serve you well in business
  • Why accountability works
  • Two words that will really make your business soar

Find out more about Gail on her Facebook page at www.facebook.com/CanDoCoffeeClub and over on her website, www.gailmgibson.com and http://gailmgibson.com/business-coaching-programmes/can-do-coffee-club/

Join my free FB community to connect with me and other fabulous solopreneurs to help you Rock Your Fabulous Biz.

 

Do You Want To Make A Bigger Impact In Your Business, With Holly Worton

In today’s episode, I will be talking to Holly Worton. Holly helps women entrepreneurs dissolve their visibility blocks and limiting beliefs around money and success so that they can take easy inspired action and grow their business to new heights.

Join my free FB community to connect with me and other fabulous solopreneurs to help you Rock Your Fabulous Biz.

Read Full Transcript below...

Using a unique process called Heart-Centered Energy Work® and drawing on her 18+ years of business experience, Holly is able to quickly cut through the noise and straight to the heart of any feelings of stuckness, frustration, doubt, overwhelm and anything else that comes up when business isn’t going as well as you’d like.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • How to make a bigger impact by transforming your business mindset
  • Where to start once you’ve made the decision to have a bigger impact
  • How to identify the blocks you may have to making a bigger impact
  • How to get clear on your current mindset that might affect your ability to make a bigger impact
  • How to get the mindset you need to make a bigger impact

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